Thursday, October 02, 2008

I Adopt A North American Approach

As the days pass, it becomes quite clear to me that there is an 'alternative approach' to working practices in North America, with a particular focus on Canada (French and English).

If you do not want to do something, you do not say "I will not do that". You just don't do it.

If you are asked to do something you have no intention of doing, you will say "I will do that" (but you will not do it).

If you ask someone if they agree with you or not, and they do not agree with you, they will say "I agree with you" anyway.

If someone thinks something is a bad idea, they will not say "I do not think that is a good idea". Nor will they say, "I think it is an interesting idea, but have you thought about xyz*?". They will also not say, "That is a bad idea". They will instead say, "Do you think that is a good idea?".

When someone says or does something stupid, no-one says anything; they just look at the floor.

If someone is cross about something they will write a tight email. They will not talk to you with their mouths directly looking at you in the face; nor will they telephone you up. They will press 'send' and then run away very quickly.

If someone has an 'issue' with you, they will not say for e.g.: "You know I think we should talk, I think there may be some misunderstandings between us", or "I think we should talk because I am not sure we are getting on very well", or "I think you are being a bit unfair can we talk about it please?".

They will just sit in their office sulking and/or crying for up to and including four days until you say, "What is the matter you seem to be out of sorts!", and then they will say OH NOW YOU NOTICE and then you will find out that on a Tuesday 3 weeks ago you may or may not have said something that may or may not have been absolutely 100% correct.

If there is something to be done e.g. a project and or task involving many people, 'the buck' will be passed until someone says, "Who is leading this project please?" at which point everyone will look at the floor and another 5 days are wasted.

I believe this strange type of behaviour is called ' being passive aggressive', and it is quite the most appalling thing to have to deal with every day, particularly if you are of the English "Come on chaps let's get to it!" school of management. I hear on the 'grapevine' that it is EVEN WORSE in America (i.e., the bit of North America that is not Canada). I find this notion barely credible!!!



* e.g. if you do this someone will die/we will be arrested/it isn't want the client wants at all not in one million years

P.S. what the shit is going on with my formatting? My lines are all awry and too close together, from what I can see on my "Macintosh Computer", and the font is sometimes big and sometimes small. Ghastly.



12 comments:

Anonymous said...

I think is possibly your bestest ever post! I loved it!
I also didn't really understand passive-agressive until recently and I think it's rather scary.

WrathofDawn said...

*looks at floor*

You know why.

And it's about time you noticed, too.

*sob*

Anonymous said...

My (US American) boyfriend says that he cannot even get his (US American) coworkers to make a decision as to where they should go for lunch. They'll just look at the floor (and probably whine afterwards that the group never goes for lunch to this Mexican place they like so much). I thought it was only his team... apparently not!

tea and cake said...

Oh bugger. But, we love you. And, we tell you so. Without sniffling, crying or anyfink like that, don't we?

Special K said...

I can't compare my experience to anything else, but, yes - that is a very accurate interpretation of the working culture in the US. I just assumed it was like that everywhere!

NON-WORKINGMONKEY said...

Sadly it is NOT like this everywhere, otherwise I would have not noticed it and been angry. On the other hand it's better than the endless parade of 'youths' wandering around asking for things the whole time.

I am 102.

Waffle said...

Oh. It was always like this in England when I worked there. It must be different in the creative professions.

Come to Belgium! Here we say to each other: "your idea is stupid" and "no I will not do that" to our bosses. Such larks. Oh, but I have resigned so there must be something wrong with it. Hmm.

Bring your assertive agression to the workplace and create a revolution - yay!

NON-WORKINGMONKEY said...

Jaywalker -this cannot be true!!! On the other hand I don't live in England anymore because I find it very annoying, so perhaps it has gone the way of the rest of the world. Also England is mainly made up of call centres full of people putting you through the wrong person and slack-faced youths arguing with Simon Cowell.

Anonymous said...

I can go one better!

Take a massive, truly massive, portion of passive-aggressive Americanism and then stir in equal parts academic arrogance; professional jealousy and pettiness; total and complete lack of understanding of anything not related to a veeeeeery specific piece of arcane knowledge.

If that's not a recipe for a happy healthy workplace then I simply don't know what is.

Anonymous said...

So, that passive-aggressive thing I have never really understood is really just the outward manifestation of fear of confrontation?

Unknown said...

the wisdom of monkeymother!

WHY AREN'T YOU WRITING A BLOG, MA'AM????

Anonymous said...

Fabtastic, I'll fit in just fine there then! Not my fault, I started out french and not scared at all but working (and living) in England has taught me that confrontation isn't the right thing to do (should you wish to keep your job)! Roll on Canada!! :-)

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